Laugh and the world laughs with you; fart and they'll stop laughing.
What's invisible and smells like carrots? Bunny farts.
How can you tell if a woman is wearing pantyhose? If she farts, her ankles swell. Confucius say, "Man who fart in church sit in own pew."
"Darling," says a husband coyly to his wife, "let's swap positions tonight." "What a good idea," she replies. "You stand in front of the sink and do the dishes and I'll sit in front of the TV and fart."
A midwife is walking past the hospital staffroom, when she hears two African doctors talking, "I'm telling you it's wumba: W-U-M-B-A," says the first.
"No. It's woombaa: W-O-O-M-B-A-A," says the second.
"No, no, no. Wumba: W-U-M-B-A," says the first again.
At this the nurse pops her head through the door, "I think you'll find, gentlemen, it's WOMB: W-O-M-B,"
The two doctors look blankly at her, until one of them says, "Madam. I doubt if you've ever even SEEN a water buffalo, let alone heard one fart in a mudpool,".
Is there any more nerve-racking moment for a man than attempting the first fart after having diarrhoea?
A human fart can be louder than a trombone.
I discovered that at my daughter's school concert.
I didn't fart in front of my wife until we were married.
I don't think the vicar was impressed.
After being woken by a loud fart my wife said, "Oh, for Christ's sake! It's me or that bloody dog, time to decide!"
I replied, "It was probably you, the dog's generally don't smell as bad as that."
I keep farting Mike Oldfield tracks,
I've been diagnosed with tubular bowels.
you know its a good fart when the dog wakesup, gives u a disgusted look and leaves the room
What's black and has four legs?
My Jack Russell after I tried to light one of his farts.
What's invisible and smells like carrots? Bunny farts.
How can you tell if a woman is wearing pantyhose? If she farts, her ankles swell. Confucius say, "Man who fart in church sit in own pew."
"Darling," says a husband coyly to his wife, "let's swap positions tonight." "What a good idea," she replies. "You stand in front of the sink and do the dishes and I'll sit in front of the TV and fart."
A midwife is walking past the hospital staffroom, when she hears two African doctors talking, "I'm telling you it's wumba: W-U-M-B-A," says the first.
"No. It's woombaa: W-O-O-M-B-A-A," says the second.
"No, no, no. Wumba: W-U-M-B-A," says the first again.
At this the nurse pops her head through the door, "I think you'll find, gentlemen, it's WOMB: W-O-M-B,"
The two doctors look blankly at her, until one of them says, "Madam. I doubt if you've ever even SEEN a water buffalo, let alone heard one fart in a mudpool,".
Is there any more nerve-racking moment for a man than attempting the first fart after having diarrhoea?
A human fart can be louder than a trombone.
I discovered that at my daughter's school concert.
I didn't fart in front of my wife until we were married.
I don't think the vicar was impressed.
After being woken by a loud fart my wife said, "Oh, for Christ's sake! It's me or that bloody dog, time to decide!"
I replied, "It was probably you, the dog's generally don't smell as bad as that."
I keep farting Mike Oldfield tracks,
I've been diagnosed with tubular bowels.
you know its a good fart when the dog wakesup, gives u a disgusted look and leaves the room
What's black and has four legs?
My Jack Russell after I tried to light one of his farts.
In honour of Wobble
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