think your having a bad day

>
>
> Fire authorities in California found a corpse in a burned-out section of
> forest while assessing the damage done by a forest fire. The deceased
> male
>
> was dressed in a full wet suit, complete with scuba tanks on his back,
> flippers, and face mask. A post-mortem test revealed that the man died
> not
>
> from burns, but from massive internal injuries. Dental records provided a
> positive identification.
>
>
> Investigators then set about to determine how a fully clothed diver ended
> up
> in the middle of a forest fire. It was revealed that on the day of the
> fire,
> the man went diving off the coast, some 20 miles from the forest. The
> fire
>
> fighters, seeking to control the fire as quickly as possible, had called
> in
>
>
> a fleet of helicopters with very large dip buckets. Water was dipped from
> the ocean and emptied at the site of
> the forest fire. You guessed it. One minute our diver was making like
> Flipper in the Pacific, the next, he was doing the breast stroke in a
> fire
>
> dip bucket 300 feet in the air. Some days it just doesn't pay to get out
> of
>
>
> bed.
> ___________________________________________
>
>
> Still think you're having a bad day?
>
>
> A man was working on his motorcycle on the patio, his wife nearby in the
> kitchen. While racing the engine, the motorcycle accidentally slipped
> into
>
> gear. The man, still holding onto the handlebars, was dragged along as it
> burst through the glass patio doors. His wife, hearing the crash, ran in
> the room to find her husband cut and bleeding, the motorcycle, and the
> shattered patio door.. She called for an ambulance and, because the house
> sat on a fairly large hill, went down the several flights of stairs to
> meet
>
>
> the paramedics and escort them to her husband. While the attendants were
> loading her husband, the wife managed to right the motorcycle and push it
> outside. She also quickly blotted up the spilled gasoline with some paper
> towels and tossed them into the toilet. After being treated and released,
> the man returned home, looked at the shattered patio door and the damage
> done to his
> motorcycle. He went into the bathroom and consoled himself with a
> cigarette
>
>
> while attending to his business. About to stand, he flipped the butt
> between
> his legs. The wife, who was in the kitchen, heard a loud explosion and
> her
>
> husband screaming. Finding him lying on the bathroom floor with his
> trousers
> blown away and burns on his buttocks, legs and groin, she once again
> phoned
>
>
> for an ambulance. The same paramedic crew was dispatched. As the
> paramedics
>
>
> carried the man down the stairs to the ambulance they asked the wife how
> he
>
>
> had come to burn himself. She told them. They started laughing so hard,
> one
>
> slipped, dropped the stretcher and dumped the husband out. He fell down
> the
>
>
> remaining stairs, breaking his arm.
> ______________________________________________
>
>
> Still having a bad day? Just remember, it could be worse...
>
>
> The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the Exxon Valdez oil
> spill
>
> in Alaska was $80,000. At a special ceremony, two of the most expensively
> saved animals were being released back into the wild amid
> cheers and applause from onlookers. A minute later, in full view, a
> killer
>
> whale ate them both.
> _____________________________________________
>
>
> Still think you are having a bad day?
>
>
> A woman came home to find her husband in the kitchen shaking frantically,
> almost in a frenzy, with some kind of wire running from his waist towards
> the electric kettle. Intending to jolt him away from the
> deadly current, she whacked him with a handy plank of wood, breaking his
> arm
> in two places. Up to that moment, he had been happily listening to his
> Walkman.
> _______________________________________________
>
>
> STILL think you're having a bad day?
>
>
> Two animal rights protesters were protesting at the cruelty of sending
> pigs
>
>
> to a slaughterhouse in Bonn, Germany. Suddenly, all two thousand pigs
> broke
>
>
> loose and escaped through a broken fence, stampeding madly The two
> protesters were trampled to death.
> ____________________________________________
>
>
> What?! STILL having a bad day??
>
>
> Iraqi terrorist Khay Rahnajet didn't pay enough postage on a letter bomb.
> It
> came back with "return to sender" stamped on it. Forgetting it was the
> bomb,
> he opened it and was blown to bits.
>
>
> There now, feeling better?
>
>
>
>

think your having a bad day